Driving home from my trail run this morning, I heard an old Billy Dean song on the radio called, “Only Here For A Little While.” The entire message of the song is amazing (Lyrics: http://www.lyricstime.com/billy-dean-only-here-for-a-little-while-lyrics.html), but the chorus goes like this:
Gonna hold who needs holding,
mend what needs mending, walk what needs walking,
though it means an extra mile,
pray what needs praying, say what needs saying,
’cause we’re only here for a little while.
Although the chorus as a whole really exemplifies how we all should strive to live our lives, one line in particular really struck me and I haven’t been able to shake it from my mind all day. That line is mend what needs mending. Essentially, forgive and ask for forgiveness. I was reminded of the importance of forgiveness just yesterday.
I was in a “move it or lose it” kind of mode when a wonderful and dear friend of mine altered the plan of action that I had in mind for the afternoon. It was completely justified from her end, but it still altered my plan and I reacted poorly. Not only that, my frustration was evident. My reaction was not spoken in words, but most certainly through my body language. I failed and considering my extremely fallible humanity, that often happens to me. Sometimes I just get to a point in my frustration where I can see myself acting in an undesired manner and I can acknowledge it as such in my head, but I just can’t seem to stop myself from proceeding to act like a jerk. I mean, what the heck, Jackie?!
As soon as I was able to move through my frustration, the guilt set in, leaving me remorseful for having reacted in such a childish way. I spent the rest of my afternoon dwelling on this situation, my actions, my self-disappointment and my compassion for my poor friend who was at the other end of my unraveling emotions. I also knew that the only “fix” to the situation was to ask for forgiveness.
Tough to do at times, but so healing of mind, heart and soul (for both parties) in the end. Seeking forgiveness is not easy because we must first humble ourselves. We must first address that we were wrong and we so often allow our pride to get in the way of that. However, I know that I am able to find healing every time I seek forgiveness or choose to forgive in some way, shape, or form. And you know what? Once again, I was able to find healing after asking my friend for forgiveness and pointing out how I had wronged her. In fact, navigating difficult conversations as such often contributes to a deeper friendship or relationship with others. It’s amazing what forgiveness can do for people.
Furthermore, if you’re the person holding a grudge because someone has wronged you, don’t wait for them to seek forgiveness. Take responsibility for your part in the situation and even if you really didn’t feel at fault, apologizing and asking for forgiveness can make a big difference. You will be amazed at how it will affect not just the other person’s heart, but yours as well. Learn to soften your heart. Take my advice learned from experience and mend what needs mending. There is great healing in forgiveness.
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